.. mother, but the only difference is their race. I see my grandmother look at my uncle dumbly, but when she looks at my dad she looks at him just like she looks at my mother. I see my mom and dad’s as equals in their marriage. They both work and make the decisions together. They always talk about things and it seems to me that they never argue.
They both share the house hold duties, sometimes my mom cooks and does the dishes, but sometimes my dad does the same. I don’t see one doing more than the other. I think that this is a good way to keep a marriage together. My grandmother on the other hand was raised in China and came over here being the wife of my Grandpa. My grandmother did all the cooking and cleaning and raising the kids. I just remember my Grandpa smoking and hanging out with his friends.
I know that my grandparents loved each other, but it was different than the way my parents love each other. My grandmother grew up respecting her husband’s decisions and not having a say so in any decision. In the movie the Joy Luck Club sex and marriage is one of the cultural gaps that a mother and daughter have to get through. I think that the story of Lindo and Waverly, best shows this. The way that Lindo grew up in China reflects the way that she is in America. Lindo was sold to a matchmaker when she was in China, she was told by her mother how to act or how to be an obedient wife in her new family. Lindo realized that this is not the kind of life that she wanted and she gets a rail ticket to Shanghai.
Waverly on the other hand was grew up in America where the American customs have influenced her way of thinking. Waverly wanted to please her mother and she even married a Chinese Man. But still this didn’t please her. When Waverly divorced him she thought that her mother blamed her. Waverly was scared to introduce her fiance to her mother, because she thought that her mother wouldn’t approver of her decision.
The conflict between the two shows the conflict between the Chinese Culture and the American Culture and how it collides together. Lindo thinks that Waverly is ashamed to be her daughter. She thinks this because of the way that Waverly acts and communicated to her mother. When Lindo tells Waverly about her mother and her memories. Lindo finally tells her that she only wants the best for her.
Waverly tells Lindo that she has so much power over her, and that anything that she does never pleases her. And from this moment it seems like the two cultures have found a common ground, so that both mother and daughter are happy. In all the stories all the mothers want is the best and happiness for their daughters. Sex and Marriage is also apparent in the story of Ying- Ying. In China Ying- Ying was married to a bad man who was what she dreamed for, but ended up to be very bad.
Ying- Ying had realized that her husband was happiest when he was cruel. But it is hard to get out of a marriage especially when there is a son involved. She knew that if she killed him that she would loose something that she loved her son. He had taken away her innocence and so she took from him the only thing that she could she took from him, his son. When she lost her son her spirit was lost also.
This haunted her all the way to America, and so when she had a daughter in America she had no spirit cause she had none to give to her. The way that Ying-Ying grew up in China is different than the way that Lena grows up in America. But since Ying- Ying brought Lena up not knowing her worth she didn’t know how to choose the right husband for her. She didn’t know her value. In China marriage is based upon the husband and in America the marriage is based upon both.
I can see this in the movie but I can also see this in the way that my mom grew up. I think that I can relate more to the daughters. But my mom has helped me realize the value and worth of myself, by telling me and showing me. I think that in the case of Ying- Ying that in my culture, it would be easier to leave him. With the law on my side I think that I could take away more than what he took away from him.
I could take away his son but also keep my spirit. When I watched the movie I thought that Ying-Ying acted dumb. I thought that she didn’t have to kill her son to take something away from her evil husband. I think that I acted this way because I was raised in America. Knowing that adultery, and abuse is wrong, I think that I could have taken the son with out killing him. I think that I acted in an ethnocentric manner, because of the way that I grew up.
In America you grow up watching the news or reading about the bad and how you could have done better. Just by watching the news you can see trials of battered wives going back to people who beat them. I always ask my self why “that’s dumb”. I think I act this way because I am educated, and that I know the law enough to know who is right and who is wrong in a situation. I think that my way is better because the son would still be alive and not dead, so I think that is why I also acted ethnocentric.
Looking at the scene in a culturally relative way, I think Ying- Ying acted in the situation was the best for the story line and the time and place that she was in. I know that if I was in China in that time period I would feel trapped and not know what and how to get out of such a marriage with out being killed or hurt. I don’t think that I could have gotten the same view of Ying- Ying and the way she is if she acted differently in that situation. In the movie The Joy Luck Club, the characteristics and differences between the two Cultural, of mother and daughter, have brought more light into my culture. I relate to this movie more than then the other because I am a Chinese American. I don’t relate so much to the daughters but more than the mothers, since I am a 2nd generation Chinese.
The movie was more about the spirits and dreams of the mothers and the hopes for a better life for their daughters in America. The struggle between the two cultures and the acceptance of mother and daughter are also present in the movie. By looking at the different stories of mother and daughter I could see the differences in the Culture and the gap that they had to overcome. I think that in my life the gap is much smaller than the gap that the mother and daughters had to overcome. I think this because of the way that my mom raised me.
She raised me thinking nothing but the best for me. I think that I can live up to her expectations because of the way that she accepts what I do. The movie opened my eyes to this and made me think, and to come to a conclusion on why I do what I do. The ugly duckling that came from afar and grew into more than what it was supposed to be, a beautiful swan. But taken away and only the feather and the memories of what it was. A beautiful swan, that proved everyone wrong.